The New Athwiit
Ok….I am not athletic.
I never have been. You can ask any of the folks that grew up with me…they will smile and tell you that Susan has never been picked first for any sport on any team ever.
I hated gym. I really did. Changing clothes in the middle of my day, sweating off my carefully applied makeup and wrecking a good hairdo never seemed like a good idea to me. I mean, really…I spent a good hour every morning getting my fabulosity on…destroying it in 45 minutes by doing things that were most unladylike….so not attractive to my way of thinking.
I am in complete agreement with Suzanne Sugarbaker on this matter. If I could have had my period for four years straight to get out of gym class…I would have taken that option with a glossy lipped smile and a pop of my bubble yum. ( yeah, I know I just dated myself…twice.)
So, as you can imagine…the minute I became an adult, the hidden inner Athlete Suzy, was immediately beaten to death with a teasing comb and a can of hairspray….we are not sure who the assailant was, but there is rumor that Theater Suzy did it. She was still sore about having to reschedule her high school musicals when the football team made it to finals.
But,I have to admit, there is a part of me that always wanted to be a pony tail girl. You know the ones….wearing those stretchy shorts and cute little tshirts with their little tennis shoes and precious little socks. They usually had their shiny hair pulled back in a stretchy band. That shiny, bouncy little ponytail doing it’s healthy little dance with every step of a Nike swoosh. Fresh faced with a slightly burned nose, those girls, although not very glamorous, looked like they were having fun. But, I wasn’t every very good at doing what they did to have fun. I was way more Rita Hayworth than Doris Day and I knew it. Besides, Rita Hayworth was having a kind of fun that looked pretty good to me. I went with that. 🙂
BUT….when I hook up the Wii…..and we just did.
I am FREAKING ATHLETIC FIERCENESS, Y’ALL!
I am BOTH of those Williams girls! I am Cal Effing Ripkin! I am Tiger Woods with ALL the phone numbers and text messages. Because WHO, I ask you, WHO doesn’t want to date a great athlete?
So I play….hell yes I play. My Fitness age on the Wii is a decade younger than I am. Oh yeah…. Competitive me DIGS that I can get younger if I am faster or play better. So I play…harder and more and faster…
Now, my arm is killing me.
I am afraid that I have a virtual sports related Injurwii
So, like a true Athwiit…I am playing through it. I am switching up to the Zumba today. I will be shaking my behind like that cute dark haired chick from Dancing with the Stars. Hopefully I will not pass out from it like Marie Osmund. 🙂
I am trying like hell to get my heart rate up and my dress size down with this one. The plan is to stay inside and work up to the real world. I am starting slow from a complete stop to moving forward. I am starting on the inside of me and working to the outside too. Loving myself and caring for the old girl from the inside will ease me into enjoying the care and maintanence of the outside girl. I mean, besides the pedicures and hairdo’s. 🙂
So, once I have increased a little stamina…I may get more athletic half of this domestic duo to take me outside and teach me to play tennis. I keep telling Sondra that if she hits the ball too me, I will do better…that whole running around thing…well…you know.
Until then…it is mii and the wii…..I just hope I don’t throw my hip out doing the Zumba and have to go to Wiihab. 🙂
Enjoy that sunshine today!
Smooch out with a shake, y’all.