I think I have a Honky Tonk Angel…

yeah…and I think that she effects me in large ways.

I call her Halelula. She looks a great deal like Dolly Parton,  but not the skinny, new millenia version. No..No…like the Best Little Whorehouse in Texas version, with the fabulous big wigs and matching hips.

You know…

Just lots of good will…and maybe one small thrill….but there’s NOTHIN Dirty goin on!

She’s not the angel that you would think of when ever you think of an angel…but she is a good one. I love her. I do.

She leads me to be sweet, and to smile at folk that aren’t smiling. She leads me to love unconditionally and to preach that love to those who to hear it and to spread it around like fertilizer on a rose garden. She encourages me to feed people and starve hatred. She teaches me to hug with full body and and extra squeeze, and to mean it when I do it. She shines as brightly as the rhinestones on her dress and that blonde wig perched atop big eyes and high cheekbones is a luminous halo. She shows me that beauty comes from all places and in all ways and that the light of Spirit in each of us is the most fabulous sight to behold. She lets me see it, and makes me humbled in it…and grateful for the gift of it.

She also lets me be human. She understands that I am gonna get mad. She never frowns when my language turns as blue as her eyes. She understands that sometimes that the threat of a good ass whoopin is the best release of negative energy for me. She sits patiently with me when I speak ill of others, and holds me accountable for it later. She loves big, and she loves tough. She is simple and complicated, just like me. 🙂

She leads me to the pathway of beauty…both inside and out.

She sits on my shoulder at the beauty supply store while I peruse the wigs and false eyelashes. She was there with me every morning of my sixth grade year, as I hid behind the garage to smear frosty blue eyeshadow on my lids before I caught the bus. She was with me at the Revco when I used my first allowance to buy a pair of false eyelashes and a set of tabby nails. She has held my hand at every audition that I have ever had, and guided me in the direction that I needed to go.  Her opinon has been a blessing in every dressing room and lingerie section that I have ever set foot in.  And how could I ever have stood tall in my shoes without her gentle nudging towards shoe stores with four inch heels?

She let me know that sometimes speaking isn’t the only way to share your love. So, she helped me find the chord progression on the guitar that I can play with fingernails. She whispered in my ear ” Baby, you know four chords, you can sing about anything.” She was right, and she’s right there with me, tapping her divine foot, while I beat that guitar half to death to sing some hurtin kinda song.

She tells me everyday in my ear that I am the best thing since sugar. She came to me today twice to let me know it. I sure did need to hear it. She tells me in so many ways, and I promised her today that I would start to pay attention. She tells me in every hug I get and every smile that is given to me. She tells me in every ring of laughter or when someone says my name with a smile on their lips. She lets me see it reflected in the eyes of those who care about me. I hope they see it back for themselves.

So, tonight I think I am gonna have a cocktail in her honor. She digs that……okay, I dig that…whatever. But I am going to say thank you to her from the middle of a country girl’s heart. We may pick up the guitar or just sing some karaoke, either way we will be raising the vibration of the day…of the week….and we all love that.

PS….almost one month no sugar, y’all. A little Asian woman tried to trip me up yesterday at the Chinese restaurant. Halelula was right there and someone drank theirs first and caught it before I did!  If I am gonna mess this up it is going to be with creme brulee’ or a ho ho or something…not with a damned glass of tea, y’all!

Smooch out, angels.  Big Love on all of you!

http://www.susanrushing.com

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